Yiinz.
Sweet 16. Give her a birthday present on 28th of Feb. She belongs to Alister Then Yang Tu at 250409 ♥. She love her man alot. So girl, Fuckoff please. :)
Yiinz Chin
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Sunday, August 26
,
4:14 PM
3years 4months 1days
It's been awhile I didn't blog already ! Recently didn't have any big news happen, not like last time anymore .. Not longer jiu break up or quarrel de . Hahaha ! Yesterday we view our old time's FB inbox message, and we laugh at each other .. Look back last time's memories, really feel funny and memorable ! What kind of things also happened between us , but feel glad that now we are very good and love each other more & more .. He went to Brunei work from June :( Last week he come back Kch for one week cause of Raya Holidays ! We had a lot of fun and eat a lot of food =.= [We're very fat now] And now, he went back for work again .. I miss him a lot ! Feel want to go with him but I can't . Zone examination is coming soon on September, school test on October & SPM on NOVEMBER ! Time pass really fast and SPM is just around th corner T_T Still haven't start to study yet :P Still wondering what am I going to do after my high school .. Continue my study ? Or just work ? I have no idea man :( I think I should settle my SPM first then think about it la . I get my driving license already, on June ! But not really excited anymore after get it , cause he's not here with me and I go where also alone .. No one acc me go eat , watch movie or anywhere :(
MISS HIM A LOT !
MISS HIM A LOT !
Thursday, May 5
,
8:22 PM
2 years and 22 days
This afternoon I asked you, don't you feel that we're like friend more than couple? Then you replied, you lost th feeling. That time I really felt terrible and super sad ! I don't know what to do, I just keep on crying and crying .. Even I'm very tired but I can't fall asleep, I waited for your reply for so long, you just reply me a few words .. Sigh .. You lost th feeling from me, is it my wrong ? My attitude makes you felt boring is it ? Then why when I asked you, is it th time I have to let you go ? But you said don't know .. WHY ?! Everytime I'm very serious in our relationship problems, you just know how to answer me "don't know". You don't face th truth then it doesn't mean that you forever don't have to face it ! Today you said you lost feeling from me, maybe tomorrow you will say other words that more hurt than this ? Why you don't want to tell me what you want ? Is it very hard to say it out ? Or you scared that you will hurt me ? Don't you know that you keep everything in your heart and don't say it out, it will hurt me more .. Because I don't even know what you want . What do you want from me ? Th five words from my mouth ? If you want me to say it, you can tell me also. As long as you will happy, I willing to do anything just to make you happy .. I know, I know you together with me your life become very hard and you're not happy at all .. But you should know that I'm not bear to let this relationship to go . I love you very much, I believe that you know too.
所以請你告訴我，你心裡面想什麼和想要我怎麼做，可以嗎？不要讓我們兩個人都覺得累 ..
Wednesday, May 4
,
11:23 PM
2 years and 21 days
I'm now sitting in front of my laptop and updating my blog .. Having exam recently, but I doesn't really care about it . But, I'm seriously so stressful now! Not because of school or family problem but relationship .. How to remain a good and happy's relationship with a guy that doesn't want to say everything out and keep it inside his heart ? Yes, I admitted that I have wrong too. Not because I lie to him or what, is I keep on doing th same mistake that he doesn't like .. I've tried so many times to change and makes him more happier, but I'm still very useless . Last night he asked me, don't you think our love already different ? I replied, I felt it a very long time ago le. And then, we remain silent and treat like nothing happened . I ask myself, this is what you want ? Being silent and do nothing is what you want ? Sigh .. I don't know, I really don't know. I think we're just like best friends more than couple, we know each other well but when we talk about our relationship's stuff, th first thing you do is remain silent and I'm th one who's complaining .. So, from now on, I also have to learn to being silent and not to complain anything . Lastly, I'm tired already .. \(ˋ＾ˊ)/
Wednesday, April 6
,
12:57 PM
1year 11months 22days
6 days ago , we broke up .. By th time , I already suffer this kind of single life for 6 days already . And 7 days to go , it will be our 2 years anniversary .. So what can I do ? I'm really sad ! I really can't live without him .. I love him so much . And fuck my life , I'm still sick now . Tired tired ! What a life ? I want to leave this sadness place . I don't want to be at here and saw lots of his thing and crying like hell everyday .. I want to be alone and I don't want to go out and face those problems ! I'm going insane ! No , I'm insane now .. Serious shit ! I feel want to give up everything and leave this fucking world ! You know what ? Soon I will leave, I'll leave this world ..
Wednesday, March 9
,
4:23 PM
1year 10months & 24days
不知道怎麼了。總覺得自己快要瘋了一樣。我好煩，好難過！他三天兩頭就為了很小的事情跟我吵架，冷戰。“她”因為我，得了憂鬱症。爸媽整天為了錢吵個不聽，媽媽又很像神經質那樣。這個家就像酒店一樣，高興就回來睡，不高興就在外面睡。到底怎麼了？！我，沒有一個完整，溫暖的家。所以，我已經不期望這個家會有什麼改變了。但是，為什麼？為什麼我就不能擁有一個很和平，很快樂，很幸福的感情或友情呢？我一生人有兩個好朋友，可是現在她們兩個都是我最恨的人。所以，我不再相信“朋友”這兩個字。說到底，她們只是在利用我。他呢？我真的不知道我們的感情出現了什麼問題。一份愛會出現裂痕，兩個人都要負責任。他討厭我對他大聲，討厭我在別人面前不給他面子，討厭我跟別的男生很要好，討厭我命令他。我從來都沒有抱怨過，我接受他對我的討厭，然後我給我自己時間改掉。我跟我自己講“他會發現我改变的，他會好好珍惜我的”。但是，每次他跟我吵架的時候，跟我冷戰的時候，大聲喊我的時候，把我一個人丟下的時候，我就一直在跟自己講“他不會不愛我的，他不會變的。他只是壓力很大，不知道怎麼面對我而已。“所以，我給你空間和時間，我不去煩你，不去打擾你。也許這樣，你會更愛我，會懂得我做的一切都是為了你。我不知道我是不是在自欺欺人，但是我真的可以為了你付出一切。因為你是第一個走進我內心深處的人。我愛你，鄧仰土。
Monday, December 20
,
5:41 PM
1 year 8 months & 5 days
Happen a lot of things recently . All of this is it a fate ? Why God treat us so unfair ? I always blame myself ! I blame myself why that day I didn't reply your text didn't answer your phone call . If I reply your text , I answer your phone , maybe all of this couldn't happen ? And now we together happily watching movie or hanging out ? Why ? I always asking myself ; Why ? Why we always got so many problem have to face through ? Th 2nd year of Christmas we also can't meet and celebrate it together . I really don't know why .. ☹
Monday, October 25
,
11:24 PM
1 year 6 months and 9 days
Alright , once again I'm blogging now. Lol .. What to say now ? Cold war ? Lost contact ? But this time is me decided to do like this not him . Recently I felt LOST ! Super super to th max ! I felt like I almost th end anytime. Last night you said everything that you kept in your heart . After I heard it, my heart felt broken. I've so many question to ask , so confused in everything . Why ? Every time when I asked you got anything must say it out but why you didn't ? Why you like to kept every thing in your heart and then suddenly everything said it out ? Don't you think like this more hurt ? Why don't you got what unhappy or dislike just say ? Why ?! Today I know you want to good back with me but you know why I choose to give each other time ? Because I don't know how to face you . I don't know I have to use what attitude to talk to you will makes you feel better . I don't know what I said will hurt you or not . I scare I just playing or joking with you , but you treat it as serious and then it hurt you again.
And now I keep repeating th song you post on your facebook. When I hearing , my tears drop itself and non stop. I felt that you're using th song to tell me how much I hurt you. I trust that God will lead us back if we really love each other ! I really trusted !
可怜我 走不进你的世界
可怜我 得不到你的永远
可怜我 心碎了不只千遍
你没感觉 这份爱怎么给断了线
\
Sunday, September 26
,
1:18 PM
1 year 5 months and 10 days
Hmmm , how to describe my feeling now ? Complicated ? Confused ? Whatever lah ! So stress in everything now ! I don't know what I want . Even you give me 365 days to think , I also don't know . You're right , I'm just a kid , a 15 years old kid . Fooling around like a kid , immature like a kid . Lol ! Chin Yin Yin ah , what happen to you ? You changed so much . Not become good is even worst ! You make until everyone so damn disappointed on you , you know ? Hahahah ! I thought even no ones understand me but you sure understand me , you will know what I wants . But you also don't understand me . Make me kinda sad and disappointed . What to do ? Life barh ! I pray to god , I asked for help . I asked him , what should I do ?
Tired to argue , tired to quarrel , tired for everything . If you choose to don't care me , then I'll respect your decision . Enjoy your life without me , boy :')
Tired to argue , tired to quarrel , tired for everything . If you choose to don't care me , then I'll respect your decision . Enjoy your life without me , boy :')
Thursday, August 26
,
2:06 PM
Everythings goes wrong .. Uh oh !
Hey! I'm back again .. Lol ! Alright alright .. I know no one will see this blog because no one know this blog link , only you will see this . But i'm not write for u to see lah , just wanna say out loud! so stress recently! Pra Pmr-ing barh . Hmmm .. But still okay lah, at least i know how to do ? :D But then , my relationship .. Erm , still okay i think ? But maybe after so many problem and quarrel , hot coffee become warm coffee liao .. Maybe u dont know what i say lah, but its alright .. better than no coffee to drink, right ? sometimes felt so complicated , so annoying , so tired .. but i still holding it , because i know ure my first love .. maybe u think i'm stupid or naive , but true what ? xD most of th time , i dont know what are u thinking and what do u want . maybe i still dont know u well ? i admit i'm not a good girlfriend in this world , i admit i treat my boy not good , i admit i'm savage or small gas .. but this is me! this is how i am if i truly fall in love ! before i dont care u go where, with who, got smoke or take drugs or not .. because i thought we're just a simple relationship .. but who knows? we've been together for 1 year and 4 months =) No one know what will happen next second . So my boy, appreciate everything now k ? At least we appreciate everything and we didnt regret .. Dont do th same mistake like me, regret what i said and now i get nemesis ..
Monday, June 28
,
6:35 PM
♥
hey! i've been an age didn't update my dead blog already. haha! so how's life recently ? hmm.. everything's fine ? i think! :D result came out already. and it's kinda poor man! have to be serious on my next examination -- Pra PMR. wtfffffff ? i've been relax for half year already and i never knew it ! goddamn it! never mind ~ there's always a chance for everybody :D oh ya! what a fuckin shit happen today . big aunty visited man! holy shit shit shit! i wanna drink cold water :( ffffffff it ! hey! you know what ? today , i done another first time x) .. first time i made honey lemon drink xD funny right ? hahahahaha! because i never do it before mah :P and it taste niceeeeeee ^^ and is only for my boy :) haih! somethings happen last few weeks and i have a unhappy's holidays on my last holidays. haih ! you know i know jiu hao :( it's not a good memories for us . and i'm so so sad and disappointed on that time . i'm sure you knew it . but, now everything is alright . and i hope everything really alright k ? :\